COVID has hit us hard and it’s sad truth that we lost almost 3 million lives are living and passing through this pandemic for more than a year now. Kind of we used to see in movies and television series like Resident Evil and 12 Monkeys. We are experiencing it live. From work from home, long queues outside shopping malls, home quarantines, not being able to hug our closed ones staying in same home & poor migrants standing on borders to reach their own homes. Job loss, loss of closed family members, delayed salaries, no vacations, lockdowns, travel restrictions and lot more.
We all are facing it & together. I faced it, depression- to the core that I felt I am surrounded with black cloudy thoughts along with thunderstorms. All playing with my head and heart. Moving on and admitting the situation was difficult. Soon after I realised that I am getting into depression due to personal losses and trail of traumatic events I went through during pandemic, I realised that I need to get out of this else I would dig my own emotional grave. I know there are people who would critic or even think what the hell am talking? But it doesn’t matter. For emotional people it will make more sense to dig this article deeply as it might help you to change your outlook and generate more optimistic approach towards life.
First thing I had to understand was “ACCEPTANCE“. This might sound easy but it isn’t. Wasn’t easy was me at least. I had to give my all in to accept the truth about myself. Again, just myself. Accepting the fact that there will be sunrise after dark and dark after sunrise was difficult for me to accept. I was living in my own dilemma willing everything to go my way and the way I was living life was to create artificial sunrise even when it was dark. The “Law Of Attraction” was working. Fight or Flight. Soon I met someone who got me to dig deep in this word called “ACCEPTANCE“. I am going to emphasise a lot on this word throughout the article as it was building block for rest of my thought process. I could’t go any further till I understood this word deeply and admitted that my grandiose thinking was not helping me. Nothing was under my control, I realised. “Law Of Attraction” stopped working and I was sitting in my room, all alone with no one around me. Selfishness-self-centeredness! This was root of my trouble. I was driven by thousands form of fear, self-delusion, self seeking and self-pity. My self-will placed me in a position to be hurt.
Later and hardly, I had to accept that things will happen their own way and I have to act spectator sometimes. I also came across a poster that grilled my thought process even further.
Don’t Avoid Storm, Just Let It Pass. Just Sail.
“Law of Attraction” started working as I stopped expecting and became less judgemental. Fight of Flight stopped. Accepting situations and sailing through became easier. Even in worst situations I started counting more of my blessings. I had new Employer in form of Acceptance and I started believing that there is some power who is planning things for me that I was not able to plan for myself. Established on such thought process, I became less worried and less interested in my own self will. I had little plans for myself. I started enjoying beach from shore and black clouds from earth avoiding prediction of when it’s going to rain.
As I felt new power flow in I started enjoying peace of mind and was able to face life with more optimistic outlook, one day at a time. I started to become more conscious and started losing fear of today, worry of tomorrow or hereafter. It was like emotional rebirth, having new perspective towards life which was not driven by my self will. I had to quit playing God and this was keystone of new triumph through which I had feel of freedom from my own entangled thought process which was self-will run riot. At times you could just sit under lemon tree waiting for nothing to happen and you will feel life will happen when you are busy making other plans. A song for those who tool this article too seriously. 🙂